If I won the prize of laziest person, I’d ask somebody to go get it for me.Ĥ9. Group assignments helped understand why Batman works alone.Ĥ8. Can we start the weekend again? I was distracted…Ĥ7. Common sense is like deodorant – people that need it the most never use it.Ĥ6. I went to look for what is best for me and ended up opening the fridge.Ĥ5. If you can’t laugh at yourself, I can do that for you.Ĥ4. The most painful thing in the world is lying down on the couch and remember you forgot the tv remote.Ĥ3. Don’t forget the gold, the diamonds, and property.Ĥ1. Insomnia makes you a better mathematician, because you spend all night calculating how much time you will be able to sleep.įunny things to say – 40. If I’d agree with you, we’d both be wrong.ģ8. They told me to follow my dreams, so I turned to my side and kept sleeping.ģ7. Love really is blind because it can’t see me at all.ģ6. If the ex was good enough, God wouldn’t tell me to love my neighbor.ģ5. Modest and humility are necessary virtues, and only people above average intelligence, like me, realize that!ģ4. Learn this: the world doesn’t revolve around you. Eat everything, because pizza doesn’t fatten, chocolate doesn’t fatten, candy doesn’t fatten, it’s you that fattens up.įunny things to say – 30. Don’t leave for tomorrow what you can eat today.Ģ9. I was looking for the good side of life but concluded that life is a sphere.Ģ8. If I hit somebody with a dictionary, is it verbal or physical aggression?Ģ7. I’m almost dressing up as Pokémon to see if somebody goes looking for me.Ģ6. I respect the opinion of everybody who agrees with me.Ģ3. I woke up so sexy today, that instead of yawning, I meowed.Ģ2. If your girlfriend says, “You will never find somebody like me”, answer: “thank God, I want somebody different.”Ģ1. I never make the same mistake twice… I make it about five times only to make sure it really is a mistake.Ģ0. The secret for a good relationship is not having one.ġ9. It is very sad when you’re rich, handsome, and sexy, and then the alarm clock rings and ends it all.ġ8. Bipolars sometimes do, sometimes don’t.ġ7. Do you want to know the secret to get rich? Me too.ġ5. God created the man before the woman so he wouldn’t have to hear suggestions.ġ4. If a rabbit’s foot brought good luck, the rabbit wouldn’t have lost it to begin with!ġ3. For somebody to love me, it really must be love, because rich and pretty I for sure am not.įunny things to say – 12. Next: 200 Fun Things to Do With Your Friendsġ1. What does it matter if it’s the weekend when I need it to be the end of the month? If money doesn’t buy happiness, I want to be sad and rich!ġ0. But the “I told you so”, I’ll give without you asking for it.ĩ. ![]() ![]() Every time you ask for it, I’ll give my advice. I wish your life is as good as it seems on your social media accounts!Ĩ. I’m not lactose, but some people find me hard to tolerate.ħ. If I have dreams, I fight for them… But sometimes I get tired and need to sleep…Ħ. ![]() My friendship is not for sale, but we can talk about a short-term rental.ĥ. I’m not always hungry sometimes I’m sleepy too.Ĥ. ![]() Faith can move mountains, but I prefer dynamite.ģ. Silliest Funny Quips To Laugh And Cry Alongġ. Or, being the grumpy old person that you are, you can set it to the side, try to ignore it and pretend to do what you should be doing anyway – but hey, you got to the end of this paragraph, so why not try and give this list of funny things to say a go? You won’t regret it! Besides, you’ll find plenty of cranky “voices” venting below. I advise you to read this list, study and memorize it – it will help you become the quirkiest guy or gal in the room, especially if you’re all by yourself in there. What’s better than a few silly quips to make these tough times funnier and cheerful? These hilarious jokes, zingy one-liners, and dry puns will guarantee you either a genuine or a pity laugh – but laughter is always laughter after all and is truly in desperate need.
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